Like I also mentioned earlier, she only intended to show her breast, and the whole episode must have been exciting, taboo, etc that he convinced her to masturbate for him and she got him to do the same for her. As a couple, we had never done anything like this, so it bothers me that she did it all for him.
My ily were that important to me
So sorry decimated, you sound like the perfect h, I don’t understand why some women just aren’t satisfied, when they have everything right in front of them. Sorry you went through this. It is no big surprise that the om left her. He wasn’t about to leave his wife, his family.
I like to tell my h, how I want to help people, who have been through all the ups and downs of their life like I have, help them through trauma and loss etc
I hope you find your happy ending soon, look after yourself, you know you did all you could to save your marriage.
I have always thought about others feelings, I too raised treat others how you would expect to be treated. Now I will say I am a bit more hard hearted. Probably the inner protection mechanism working overtime.
It’s funny how things like this help define your life, sometimes in a good way, because you become more wiser especially after a huge hurt.
Since this happened to me, al of a sudden I woke up and thought, what am I going to do with my life? Because I am a stay t home mum, although help my h with our business, all I thought was, I can’t be putnin this position again, where I can’t support my children, because he wants another woman. So I woke up one day, truly knowing what it was I was meant to do.
I’m going to get my Bachelor of social studies in counseling, to become a qualified counsellor then do my further study and get my master in social work. I was looking at doing bachelor of psychology then master of psychology, but changed my mind as I really wanted the counselling, which is where my heart is.
So it has me wonder what the crap did he like about the ow, because it certainly doesn’t have anything to do with her being a good person, a good person doesn’t go in and try tom destroy a family.
I don’t know if I was the perfect husband but I never stopped trying. ..I wanted to put in 100% because I valued them. I think she did have it pretty good. I wanted her to feel good about our life together. One of the reasons I put so much effort into our life was because I was married once before…24 years ago. The marriage only lasted for a little over a year. My first wife cheated on me as well…with a co-worker. I found out almost immediately and because we were only married a short time and had no children; I divorced her with out hesitation. I didn’t want to build a life with her on a cracked foundation. It hurt for a long time but it was a good decision in my mind.
The sad thing is my wife knew all about the cheating Azerbaijani mulheres that destroyed my first marriage. She knew the pain I endured as a result. We had many discussions about infidelity and she swore she could never do that to someone…and would never do that to me. She would even refer to my first wife as a whore. After going through that in my first marriage I was very careful about whom I dated. I was always looking for red flags. I guess I failed to lean that sometimes people just change. Oh, her OM did dump her…and his wife too.